Not So Swiss Miss

Considering my parents are literally off-the-boat from Switzerland, it's logical that cheese and chocolate are thought to be (the only) food groups in my family. So, as a first generation American I fully intended to pass on this tasty bloodline to my offspring.

In fact, I rationalized that the results of a study by the University of Helsinki illustrating the lasting effect on happiness for babies born to chocolate-eating moms gave me not only license to eat chocolate, but would constitute child abuse if I failed to gobble some every day during my pregnancy.

Being a fan of scientific reasoning, I surmised that the endorphin exuding effects of chocolate in utero could be continued after birth via mother's milk.

Well, guess who shot that theory to hell.

Last week when Quinn's new doctor (they rotate them every three weeks) looked at her x-ray following her latest bloody stool, she asked the nurse what my diet was like. The nurse said she wasn't sure but was pretty certain it was fairly healthy and that I had stopped eating dairy in case Quinn is lactose intolerant. She was then stumped when the doctor asked about my consumption of chocolate. Uncertain, the nurse came to inquire about how often I eat the heavenly stuff.

When asked, I nearly fell off my seat. Suspicious if one of the other nurses or my friend Tiffany, all of whom had quickly learned how I relish dark chocolate, hadn't set me up for some cruel joke, I stood in disbelief as the theory of the cause of Quinn's bloody stools was relayed.

Turns out that some newborns have an adverse reaction to chocolate when received through breastmilk. Stupified, I explained that I'm 100% Swiss, how could my daughter not be able to digest chocolate?!?

As much as I'd like to start out each morning by diving into a bowl of melted chocolate and swimming a few laps before licking off every last drop, I generally don't do that, nor eat more than a small square each day -- if that!

Not only does she not look like me, she doesn't even have the fundamentals of my genetic makeup if she is lactose intolerant AND can't eat chocolate!

Obviously, I'm going to have to file for a maternity test.

So, as unnatural as it is, for the last several days I have been chocolate-free. To my and many others' surprise, it appears that Quinn's digestive malaise is passing and chocolate may indeed have been the cuplrit.

It's an easy fix, but I do wonder if there was a mix-up at the hospital as this little one is not much of a Swiss Miss!